


oh boy, did tyler fuck up.

by TyjoBeans



Category: Twenty One Pilots, joshler - Fandom
Genre: Anal, Fingering, Flirting, I have no idea why i wrote this, M/M, Oops, Sex Toys, Smut, Teasing, and josh helps him, doctor!josh, i thought it would be funny, im sorry, joshler - Freeform, kind of counts as public sex i suppose?, they are akward boys, this is just weird, turns out it's just bad, tyler gets himself into trouble, tyler has a dildo stuck in his ass
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-28
Updated: 2017-11-28
Packaged: 2019-02-07 19:40:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12848145
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TyjoBeans/pseuds/TyjoBeans
Summary: "it's not like he actually wanted to sit in an almost empty emergency room in his local hospital a saturday evening, sipping on watery coffee that barely counts as lukewarm with a dildo stuck in his ass"why did i write this?





	oh boy, did tyler fuck up.

**Author's Note:**

> hi everyone! i've been away for a long time but now i'm back. yey!  
> so, i actually have the last chapter for my other fic "josh hates his job" finished, i just have to proof read it before i post it, so keep a look out! 
> 
> in the meantime, please enjoy (or cringe over) this super weird fic i wrote when i was bored and had trouble sleeping. it hasn't been proof-read or anything like that because, why? it's horrible. 
> 
>  
> 
> why am i like this.

tyler is in a little bit of a pickle...

that is, if the pickle isn't so little.

and is actually not a pickle at all but a dildo.

and if he isn't in it, but it is in him.

you see, it comes a time in everyone's life where you just have to admit you fucked up.

and oh boy did tyler.

it's not like he actually _wanted_ to sit in an almost empty emergency room in his local hospital a saturday evening, sipping on watery coffee that barely counts as lukewarm with a dildo stuck in his ass.

he thinks about all the other things he could've done instead of being where he is right now as he scrolls through his twitter, trying to kill time.

the minutes seem to move slower and slower the longer he waits, the constant ticking from the clock on the wall a brutal reminder of the passing seconds that could've been avoided, if only tyler had been a little smarter.

a middle aged woman with greying hair and wrinkles that proved a life of laughter around her eyes came into the waiting room with a notepad in her arms.

she looked down, reading something off of the paper before she cleared her throat.

"tyler joseph?" she asked, eyes scanning the room before landing on tyler. she smiled gently, warmly.

"the doctor will see you now."

with a shudder and a grimace, tyler stood from the uncomfortable chair, leaving the still coffee-filled paper cup behind.

it felt awkward to walk around, but he did his best to act normal - the last thing tyler wanted was for the whole emergency room to be able to guess just what he had been up to only an hour before.

tyler could feel the dildo move around inside of him as he followed the nurse here and there, through long corridors consisting of white walls and blue floors. he was thankful for the woman's slow pace as they made their way to the doctor that would be seeing him.

"it's right in here," said the nurse, stopping outside of a soft green door with a small window, "doctor dun will take care of you, don't you worry."

"thank you," tyler paused to read the name on her tag, "elli."

elli smiled, nodded and turned on her heel to walk away, probably to take care of the next waiting patient.

tyler took a deep breath in a lame attempt to try and calm himself down a bit, preparing for the embarrassment that was about to occur.

he opened the door slower than necessary, stalling for as long as he could.

what met him on the other side wasn't... ideal.

doctor dun was, first of all, around tyler's own age. it shouldn't really matter, but for tyler it felt like that was something that made the whole situation a lot more embarrassing.

and secondly - and most importantly - doctor dun was _hot_.

smoking. sexy. incredibly attractive.

oh jeez.

"hello there," said the doctor as he stood up from his little spinning stool.

he took a few steps towards his patient with his hand outstretched and gosh, he was even prettier up close.

tyler shook his hand as the man in white coat continued to talk; "i am doctor dun, but i'd prefer it if you called me josh."

"tyler," said tyler in some form of awkward introduction.

it was suddenly very hard to swallow.

josh flashed him a brilliant, straight teethed smile that made tyler feel ashamed of his own crooked mess before he picked up a piece of paper and skimmed through the text there.

"so..." josh said, drawing out the word, "you're in quite a pickle, huh?"

"you could say that," tyler deadpanned.

"talk me through it," josh asked.

he looked up at his patient when the room fell silent for a few, long seconds, "you don't have to be embarrassed mr joseph," he assured.

tyler puffed out his cheeks in annoyance - it was easy for josh to sit there and talk about not being embarrassed, he wasn't the one with a dildo currently halfway up to his belly.

"uhm," tyler started nervously, "i was... you know, masturbating, and-"

"-with a dildo?" josh interrupted.

"yes."

"analy?"

"yes."

tyler took a deep breath before he continued.

"and i used a lot of lube and everything got messy and slippery, and i just- uhm, kind of dropped it."

"and you couldn't get it back out?" josh questioned.

"i wouldn't be here if i could," tyler said.

josh nodded, whispering a quiet "right," under his breath before scribbling something down on his paper.

"what kind of dildo was it?"

"excuse me?" tyler asked.

"the dildo you used," josh explained, "what kind was it? size, material, all that."

tyler had to stop and think for a moment. he wasn't really all that used to playing with toys in the bedroom and tonight was the first time he tried this specific one.

"uhm..." he said uncertainly, "it was a double ended one, probably around five or six inches? i know for sure that it was made out of silicone."

josh wrote it down, nodding his head a few times to show that he was listening.

"and how long ago was it since it got stuck?"

"probably an hour and a half."

with a smile and a nod towards the examination table, josh stood up.

"alright," he said," take off your shirt and lay down on your back please."

now, tyler wasn't what you would call 'shy' and normally he would throw off his shirt in public without batting an eye, but in the presence of doctor dun he suddenly felt nervous about showing his body.

it was silly, really, and tyler's self esteem wasn't the worst, but he just couldn't compare to someone like josh and for some reason it mattered to him.

with a gulp, a deep breath and a thought of ' _get yourself together, he's a doctor for christ sake_ ', tyler grabbed the bottom hem of his shirt and pulled it up over his head, carefully laying the fabric on top of a chair placed in one of the corners of the room.

the thin, blue paper sheet that covered the examination table felt weird and loud as tyler jumped onto it, awkwardly trying to wiggle his way around without messing it up.

he made a face at the pressure inside his belly as he laid down on his back.

"so," josh began as he wheeled up to tyler, "i'm gonna try and see if i can feel exactly how deep it's stuck before we decide how to deal with this, alright? i'm just gonna push on different areas of your belly."

"right," tyler whispered in a wavering voice.

doctor dun leaned in and placed a surprisingly warm and heavy hand on top of tyler's stomach, putting light pressure right over his bladder that had tyler squirming uncomfortably.

"sorry," josh apologised without removing his hand, "just tell me if anything hurts."

a few, long minutes passed in almost complete silence while josh moved his hand around tyler's belly, putting pressure here and there and massaging certain areas.

"it feels uncomfortable right there," tyler comments quietly when the doctor rubs his hand on a spot right above his bellybutton.

josh stops his motion for a split second before he presses two fingers harder into the soft flesh.

"just uncomfortable, or painful?" he asks as he feels around.

"uncomfortable," tyler assures, "like pressure."

josh moves his fingers in small circles around the area before he stops in one spot, feeling around and humming to himself.

"well, looks like we found it," he said, pressing down on an - from the outside - almost invisible lump inside of tyler.

it's not as deep as tyler had been fearing, stopping right above his navel.

"here," josh said as he grabbed tyler's hand and carefully placed it on top of his stomach.

he presses down gently and sure enough, tyler could feel the tip of the dildo there, pushing on his insides. it was kind of hot to feel it, but tyler tried to not think about that.

josh removed his hand and rolled back a few steps, motioning for tyler to sit up as he grabbed his paper and scribbled down the new information.

"so," doctor dun began, pulling a hand through his yellow hair, "the good news is that it isn't so deep, which means that we might be able to get it out without surgery."

tyler's heart skipped a beat.

"surgery?" he questioned.

"yes. if we can't get it out manually we'll have to remove it surgically."

tyler hadn't even considered that outcome before now. he really didn't want to get surgery. explaining where his new scar came from would be terribly awkward and embarrassing.

"so, what do you suggest we do now, doctor?" tyler asks.

"well," josh says, "first of all i'm going to try and just go in there and grab it and pull it out," that whole idea made tyler blush, "if that doesn't work we might give you some anaesthesia and try again, or we'll take some x-rays and send you to a surgical doctor."

"what do you mean 'go in there'?" tyler couldn't help but question, already squirming in his seat at the thought. this was probably the worst night of his life.

"well," josh chuckled a little, obviously recognising the awkwardness, "i'll have to try and slowly stretch you open with my fingers and then hopefully i'll be able to push in a pair of tweezers into your rectum and get a hold of the dildo."

tyler could feel his entire face go red at the idea and he shamefully looked down towards his lap, nervously twiddling his fingers around each other.

"don't worry," josh said, "it's nothing i haven't seen before."

"yeah? this happens a lot?" tyler asked.

"all the time," doctor dun assured with a sharp nod of his head.

' _welp_ ', tyler thinks to himself, ' _i got myself into this mess, so i better just suck it up_ '.

the room falls silent for a while after that as josh types different things into his computer and begins to prepare different types of tools.

he asks tyler to stand up and then continues to change the paper on top of the examination table again, even though tyler is the only one who has touched it, and then he grabs a pair of rubber gloves.

tyler puts his shirt back on, even if the goosebumps on his arms aren't from the cold.

"are you ready to start?" the doctor asks from his chair, hands on his knees as he stares at tyler.

tyler gulps.

"i guess so," he says while bitterly thinking that no one could ever be ready for this.

"i'll need you to remove your pants," josh requests, "you can keep your underwear on if you'd like, but i'll have to push them down."

tyler nods and unbuttons his pants with sweaty palms and shaking fingers. why is he so nervous? this shouldn't be worse than sex, and doctor dun seems professional enough to not laugh at him. but he's so _hot_ , and tyler is... well, not hot.

with a last deep breath tyler let's his jeans fall to the floor and steps out of them before bending down to pick them up and messily throw them on the chair where his shirt was a short moment ago.

"how do you want me?" tyler says shamefully while looking at the examination table with a frown.

"i think we'll begin with you on all fours," josh says, "and if that doesn't work we can try and put you in a gynaecologist chair."

tyler would rather have the dildo stuck inside of him for the rest of his life than sit in a gyno-chair.

with a pained 'oomf', he hops onto the table and turns his body around until he's on his knees. he kisses his pride goodbye before he leans forward and supports his weight onto his elbows, standing on all fours with his ass in the air.

"let me know if anything hurts," josh says as he steps up behind him, "and try and relax, okay? i know that this is awkward, but it will be so much quicker if you're loose."

"loose. right," tyler huffs with a cheek pressed against the paper sheet.

he can see josh in his side view and now he's kind of glad that his doctor turned out to be young and sexy, and not some old woman who he would scar for life.

tyler hears how doctor dun puts on a pair of gloves, the sound of squeaky rubber filling the room, before he listens to the familiar sound of a bottle of lube being opened.

before he knows it, josh is pulling down his underwear over his ass and let's them stay right over his thighs.

tyler prays to god that his balls wont fall out.

"alright, you'll feel some pressure," josh warns before he gently inserts a lube covered finger into tyler's ass.

even though it's been almost two hours since tyler played with himself, it isn't much of a stretch there. he's still a little open and josh can add another finger right away.

"jeez," tyler chuckles awkwardly to lighten the mood, "at least take a guy out to dinner first."

josh actually _giggles_ at that and tyler can't help but feel a little satisfied. he's usually horrible in social situations - especially if they're as awkward as this one - but at least he said something right.

the doctor starts to gently scissor his fingers apart as he works his patient open and tyler is extremely grateful for the fact that he can hide his face in his hands because he really don't want doctor dun to see just how red he is.

"relax," josh reminds him as he places his free hand on the back of tyler's thigh, rubbing his rubber covered thumb there.

if this played out in a different situation, it wouldn't have been so bad. josh's warm hand feels nice on tyler's skin and his fingers feel _good_.

another finger is added and then one more and those four fingers along with the dildo leaves tyler feeling so full and nice that he almost misses the fact that he's totally growing a boner.

almost.

tyler tenses up out of embarrassment and tries to get his legs closed to hide his hard-on without awakening any suspicion from the doctor, but josh speaks up and crushes any hope tyler had that he wouldn't have noticed.

"it's okay," the doctor says, "if it was me, i would've cum already."

tyler lets out a nervous laugh at that before he clears his throat and says "sorry."

"you're good," josh assures, still working his fingers in and out slowly, "it's great that you're relaxed."

tyler huffs out a halfhearted 'mhm' as an answer before he closes his eyes.

he tries to imagine being at home in his own warm, comfy bed, and not on some emergency room table, but it's hard when the whole building smells like hospital and cleaning products.

"i can actually feel the tip of it," josh says, breaking the tense silence, "i probably won't be able to get a grip on it, but i think i can pull it out with some tweezers."

"lovely," tyler huffs out sarcastically and makes a grimace when josh withdraws his fingers leaving him feeling empty.

he has to stop himself from whining at the loss. ' _it's not the right time for any of that_ ', he thinks bitterly.

josh turns around to grab a pair of stainless steel tweezers and starts to cover them in lube. tyler swallows thickly as he stares at them from over his shoulder.

he was imagining a small set of tweezer, like the ones he uses to pull out ingrown hairs, not this massive instrument. it almost reminds him of the thing his father uses to turn hotdogs and steaks with whenever he's barbecuing.

"this probably won't be as pleasant as a pair of fingers," josh warns as he turns back around, "but it shouldn't hurt."

tyler nods to show that he's listening, and with that, doctor dun gets to work.

josh was right, it doesn't really hurt much as he gently inched the instrument inside of tyler.

it actually feels alright - maybe even good if it had been done in the safety of tyler's own bedroom.

"here we go," josh announces when he can feel that he has a somewhat safe grip on the dildo, and he slowly starts to pull it out.

he's being very gentle, working slowly so that he's not hurting his patient.

tyler tries to be quiet, he really does, but when the dildo starts moving and josh's hand touches his skin and the tweezers stretches him, he can't help but whine deep in his throat. there's so many things going on and it's all just too much.

"does it hurt?" josh asks, concern thick in his voice.

he stills to give tyler some time to collect himself.

"sure," tyler mumbles, blush high on his cheeks, "let's say that."

josh chuckles and pats tyler's thigh calmingly, or maybe reassuringly.

"need a moment?" he asks with a knowing smirk.

tyler kind of wishes that he was turned the other way so that he could kiss that stupid grin off of doctor dun's handsome face.

"yeah," he mumbles, "i don't really feel like cumming in my underwear."

josh just laugh at that and give tyler a final pat right below his butt before he kept going again.

"think about something gross then," doctor dun said as he wiggled the dildo further and further out.

"like what?" tyler questioned, biting his tongue when something brushed against his prostate.

josh hums in thought for a few seconds.

"i don't know," he said, "maybe your grandpa, or... ceiling-fans?"

"dude what? why ceili- _fuck_!"

tyler didn't have time to finish his sentence before a disgustingly wet and sticky sound filled the room, and the dildo fell out and landed on the examination table.

"eww," tyler whispered under his breath, feeling his entrance clench around nothing.

"hah!" josh called out in triumph as he picked up the dildo and placed it on a metal plate, "see? that wasn't so bad."

"easy for you to say," muttered tyler as he pulls up his underwear and stand up from the table, "you weren't the one with a stranger's fingers up your butt."

the doctor just waved him off before he removed his gloves and threw them away and went over to his computer to write down the new information.

"seems like we're done here," josh said as he clicked on the keyboard, "i gotta tell you, this was a first for me."

"a first?" tyler asked with a frown, "i thought you said that this happened all the time?"

"yeah, well, i had to say something to calm you down, right?"

josh turned away from his computer to face tyler with a smirk on his stupidly pretty face, arms crossed over his chest almost challenging.

tyler placed a hand over his heart in faux hurt.

"and here i thought that i could trust you," he cried out over-dramatically, "and you just went ahead and lied straight to my face."

josh threw his head back in laughter and it might've been the prettiest sound that tyler had ever heard.

"i'm sorry that i hurt your feelings," the doctor said in between giggles.

tyler chuckled as well as he pulled his pants back on, securing them with his belt around his hips.

"well," tyler said once he was fully clothed, "thank you for your help doctor," there was a pause before he added, "and thank you for not... you know, making it weird. or, too weird at least. i mean, it's a pretty weird situation and i was so stupid and this was probably the worst night of my life but at least you made it kind of better and i just wanted to-"

"-tyler," josh interrupted his babbling with a gentle smile, "its fine, you don't have anything to thank me for."

tyler chuckles awkwardly and scratches the back of his neck.

he tries to smile. "right," he says, "well... thanks anyways."

josh just smiled fondly before he turns back towards his computer and grabs a piece of paper, ripping off a corner and scribbling something on it.

"here," he says, handing the small piece to tyler, "if you really wanna thank me, maybe you could let me take you to that dinner you were talking about?"

to say that tyler's surprised would be an understatement. did this annoyingly hot doctor really just ask him out? especially after what had just happened during the last twenty minutes?

"really?" tyler asks, lifting his gaze from the numbers to look at josh.

doctor dun nods with a shy smile.

"i-if you want to, that is," he says while chuckling nervously, "you can say no of course, i just felt like we had this kind of flirting thing going on and i thought that maybe you felt it too."

when tyler doesn't answer right away, josh keeps babbling.

"oh gosh, i'm sorry, i shouldn't have said that, that is so unprofessional of me! i-"

and this time, it's tyler's turn to interrupt.

"-i'd love to go to dinner with you."

josh goes quiet for a full five seconds before a smile is spreading over his face.

"really?"

"sure," tyler shrugs - he doesn't wanna come across as too happy about it, afraid that he would seem lonely and desperate, even if he really felt like screaming and dancing, "i'll call you?"

"alright, sounds good," josh agrees with an excited nod and flashes another beautiful smile that makes his entire face scrunch up into a handsome mess of laughter lines, before he adds a teasing; "who knows, maybe next time i'll be around to stop you from getting a dildo stuck in your ass."

tyler makes a face at that.

"too soon man, too soon."

with that, they say their final goodbyes, and tyler makes his way towards the exit.

he gives elli a discreet nod on his way out and gets a warm smile in return.

and as he's driving home, being a dildo poorer but a hot doctor's phone number richer, tyler can't help but wonder if this was the worst, or the best night of his life.


End file.
